Three Days until Valentines Day.........
Or, "on Seynt Valentynes day,/Whan every foul cometh there to chese [choose] his make [mate]."
Written by Geoffrey Chaucer, the guy thought to have first linked the saint's day with the custom of choosing sweethearts.
Did you read that first line? When every foul cometh......what? We got Valentines Day from this gibberish? It sounds to me like this guys buddies should have waited until he sobered up to ask him what he meant.
"You want us to buy chocolates and flowers for our sweethearts? Write poetry and buy them skimpy potato sack garments?"
"No, you idiots! I said, 'on Saint Valentines day, I ate some fowl [duck]and cheese and now I need to make it [to the toilet]! You guys are morons, you mean to tell me that while I was passed out drunk, the mayor declared a holiday based on what I said in a drunken stupor? I
have a terrible hangover, a splitting headache, I'm pretty sure I slept with Ulois, the hag from the pub, and now I have to round up some chocolate and flowers for the wife?
Do you guys realize you'll probably have to have sex with your wives tonight? You may even have to talk to them.
What if this holiday actually catches on around the world? Do you realize how many guys will despise me? Do you know how many depressed women will eat bon bons and ice cream on this day if they don't have a mate? Do you realize how many Hallmark shops will spring up in
mini-malls around the country?"
"What's a mini-mall?"
"I don't know, I'm just trying to make a point. Don't you guys realize that a monster has been created that will spread throughout this world like an e coli bacteria on a all-you-can-eat buffet? How can we get out of this dreadful day? Can we get the Mayor to call the whole thing
off? Can we just move to Antartica?"
"How 'bout we start up a chocolate factory?"
"What the hell are you talkin' 'bout? A chocolate factory? I'm discussing serious matters here, and you're going on about a tasty treat...........hey, wait a minute.......
Genius!! Maybe a flower shop too! Boys, we're in business!"
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Written by Geoffrey Chaucer, the guy thought to have first linked the saint's day with the custom of choosing sweethearts.
Did you read that first line? When every foul cometh......what? We got Valentines Day from this gibberish? It sounds to me like this guys buddies should have waited until he sobered up to ask him what he meant.
"You want us to buy chocolates and flowers for our sweethearts? Write poetry and buy them skimpy potato sack garments?"
"No, you idiots! I said, 'on Saint Valentines day, I ate some fowl [duck]and cheese and now I need to make it [to the toilet]! You guys are morons, you mean to tell me that while I was passed out drunk, the mayor declared a holiday based on what I said in a drunken stupor? I
have a terrible hangover, a splitting headache, I'm pretty sure I slept with Ulois, the hag from the pub, and now I have to round up some chocolate and flowers for the wife?
Do you guys realize you'll probably have to have sex with your wives tonight? You may even have to talk to them.
What if this holiday actually catches on around the world? Do you realize how many guys will despise me? Do you know how many depressed women will eat bon bons and ice cream on this day if they don't have a mate? Do you realize how many Hallmark shops will spring up in
mini-malls around the country?"
"What's a mini-mall?"
"I don't know, I'm just trying to make a point. Don't you guys realize that a monster has been created that will spread throughout this world like an e coli bacteria on a all-you-can-eat buffet? How can we get out of this dreadful day? Can we get the Mayor to call the whole thing
off? Can we just move to Antartica?"
"How 'bout we start up a chocolate factory?"
"What the hell are you talkin' 'bout? A chocolate factory? I'm discussing serious matters here, and you're going on about a tasty treat...........hey, wait a minute.......
Genius!! Maybe a flower shop too! Boys, we're in business!"
----------------------------------
posted by david w. at 2/11/2005 09:59:00 AM
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